Unattended Cremation
What happens now
An unattended cremation is a simple way to care for someone after they have died, without holding a funeral service at the time of cremation.
If this is what you have chosen, there are still a few things that need to happen, but you don’t need to organise a funeral, find a celebrant, choose flowers or make all the decisions that can come with a traditional funeral.
1. The arrangements are confirmed
Once you have decided that an unattended cremation is what you want, the first step is to accept the Service Proposal and provide the information and authorities needed for us to begin.
There is no requirement to organise a funeral service, choose flowers, arrange a celebrant or make other decisions that you might associate with a traditional funeral.
The purpose of this process is simply to make sure your person is cared for, the necessary paperwork is completed and the cremation can take place.
2. We arrange to take your person into our care
If your person is at a hospital, aged-care facility, private residence or another location, we arrange collection and bring them into our care.
This can be confusing for families, as each situation is slightly different. While there are certain procedures that need to be followed, you do not need to manage the practicalities yourself.
Once your person is in our care, we look after them until the cremation takes place.
3. The necessary permission is arranged
Before a cremation can take place, the required permission must be granted.
We make a Application for Permission to Cremate (Form 1) to an independent doctor. They will make an examination and complete the Permission to Cremate (Form 4).
You generally don’t need to arrange this yourself. We coordinate it as part of the cremation process.
4. The cremation is booked
Once the required paperwork and medical authority are in place, we arrange the cremation with the crematorium.
With an unattended cremation, the family does not attend the cremation itself.
This can feel very different from a traditional funeral, but it does not mean that your person is being treated any less respectfully. It simply means that the cremation takes place without a ceremony or family attendance.
5. The death is registered
The information provided by the family in the Personal Details form, is used to complete the registration of the death with the Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages.
Once the death has been registered, the Registry can produce the official Death Certificate.
The certificate is normally sent to the address provided by the family. The timing can vary, but it is generally around two weeks after the cremation.
6. The cremation takes place
On the arranged date, your person is cremated.
There is no need for you to be present.
The crematorium then prepares the cremated remains, which are commonly referred to as ashes.
7. The ashes come home
Once the cremation has been completed and the ashes are ready, we arrange their return to you.
This may be by collection, delivery or registered post, depending on what has been arranged with you.
This is usually within about a week of the cremation, although timing can vary.
What do I need to do?
Usually, very little.
You may need to:
- Accept the Service Proposal
- Provide authority for us to collect your person
- Complete the Personal Details information
- Tell us where you would like the ashes returned
- Let us know if there is anything else you would like us to know
We will guide you through anything else that is required.
What if I don’t want a funeral?
That’s okay.
A funeral is not the only way to say goodbye.
Some families want a gathering with family and friends. Some want a graveside service. Some want to hold a memorial later. Others don’t want a ceremony at all.
An unattended cremation simply allows the cremation to take place without a funeral service or family attendance.
You can still say goodbye in your own way, at your own time.
What happens to the ashes?
After cremation, the cremated remains are prepared and returned to the family.
What happens after that is entirely up to you.
You might keep them at home, scatter them somewhere meaningful, bury them, place them in a memorial location, or decide later.
There is no need to make that decision immediately.
One last thing
It is easy to feel that choosing an unattended cremation means that everything has to be clinical and impersonal.
It doesn’t.
The practical part can be simple while the loss itself is anything but.
You don’t need to organise a funeral just because someone has died. You don’t need to make a lot of decisions while you’re grieving. And you don’t need to have everything worked out immediately.
Sometimes the most important thing is simply knowing that your person is being cared for, the necessary things are being taken care of, and you can take some time to work out what you want to do next.
There is no single right way to say goodbye.
Want to understand more?
If you’d like to understand more about what happens after someone dies, or why certain things need to happen, you’ll find a detailed article in P is for PROCESS, POWER and PREPARATION.
Say Goodbye Your Way is also a useful resource that can help guide you through some of these things in more detail.